How long did I kneel there
Beckoned by that other one
Who held me in my place
Reflecting back my face,
Witnessing affection
Staring into my stare.
Oblivious to all,
I harbored no regret—
They were hard and sharp as stone
Who left me there alone,
Transfixed, and yet
Transported through a channel—
Though what I could discern
Caught inside that circuit
Dried and browned and curled
Into a barren world
With no one else in it
And nothing more to learn.
And I, in my obsession,
Faded, began to shrink
Like a clenched flower
Whose head bends lower
Lower, as if to drink
In my possession.
Now the sweetness of that spring
Can't quench, and what I thirst
Is the clear deepening difference
Of a different cadence
I couldn't hear at first,
So tuned to my own singing.
How did I let her go,
My sister, who is me
And not me, all the same,
Though we may share a name
Even when we can't see
Who's above and who's below,
How shadow mirrors shadow.
But when a falling leaf
Troubled the glass,
And passing through the impasse
Keeping me from grief
I didn't want to know,
Still, it tried to stay
Afloat that former love
That formed another life
Like a cry inside a laugh.
But I had had enough
Of echo. I turned away,
I turned as to allow
Myself to turn again,
Lost in wind and rain
Peppering steps into the green
That promises no end
Even as I stumble
To find a new direction
In branches' latticework
And roots' entanglement,
To follow where they went
Like a sentence in a book
Twisting past perfection
That one can almost read,
That I could almost say
Aloud as to another,
If only I went further,
Like nighttime into day,
Sunlight into shade.
